Thursday, February 21, 2008

It seems so hard...

I got tagged by Eudora. Actually Jasmine tagged me on this a long time ago but I totally forgot to do it so here it goes...

The Rules:

1. Link to your tagger and post these rules.
2. List 8 random facts about yourself.
3. Tag 8 people at the end of this post and list their names.
4. Let them know that they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blogs.

The 8...
1. I am left-handed.
2. I love art, illustration and graphic design.
3. I am a 100% cat lover.
4. I totally sucked in any sports be it football, volleyball, basketball, netball...you name it, I suck at it.
5. I also sucked in playing video/arcade games.
6. I love Chinese foods.
7. I love reading.
8. I have a low self-confidence/self-esteem. (Still do till now)

And I am tagging anyone who wants to do it!

Okay...I am still alive and kicking but really sorry for the lack of updates. Still very much internet-less here and even in my office. I've got no computer there :( Work's been okay but I honestly have to say that I still am not confident with my job. I look at all the other lecturers and see how great they are and how great their design skills are compared to me. I seriously have no idea whether my level is UP there yet. Does my portfolio showed impressive works? I don't think so. I still worry each and everyday when a student came up to me for critique. What if I give the salah info or what if my 2 cents worth of opinion doesn't work? I've been told that I shouldn't let my low self-confidence be a part of my problem and just give this teaching profession a shot even if I have no teaching experience BUT still...it's so hard la. How many times have I felt like this and yet I still can't improve? It worries me. Then I question myself over and over again if this job is right for me.

I do want to work here in long-term but it's just that I am still not sure if I can handle this work well. I am an adult but why can't I act like one? Fyi, I'm not asking for any sympathy by writing this cos I've been writing about my "low self-confidence" problem since I first started this blog. I just felt like letting it out here again cos if I keep it inside, it'll crush me definitely. Maybe I just need more and more pushing and encouragement and self respect.

It's getting late so I should go and continue with my reading la. Oh, I just found out that Backstreet Boys is coming down to perform in sunway Lagoon! Anyone interested to go?

2 comments:

Anne said...

Yo V!

Wanna call u up earlier but was afraid that u were working & might not be able to answer my call. Anyway, nice to hear u r surviving there though lack of internet. Hehehe. It's ok. Hopefully u will have a great weekend there. As for me, i spent my Saturday doing charity instead of lazing around in the office waiting for 1pm. Hehehe. FYI, we no longer work in the office on Saturdays.

Anyway, i gotta go. Almost 5pm.

Take care & God Bless!

Lots of Love,
Anne

cs said...

Don't be so hard on yourself. You just started. Give yourself time to get used to be on the side giving out advice instead of receiving it. If it helps, I've always thought that you have good ideas. They are always so unconventional. Mine is always so typical.

You can try to talk to Shien about it. I have a feeling that she may be able to help.

And you have to stop introducing yourself as having low self-confidence or self-esteem. You are what you make yourself out to be. Don't let your own image of yourself put you down.

Oh, and this is not sympathy. It's a pep-talk. I'm sure you'll be fine. Just don't give up trying. Good luck.

P/S: I suck at playing video/arcade games too so you are not alone on that :)